Snape Meets Jormungandr
by ValentineRevenge
Summary: Snape arrives in his room at Hogwarts to find everything has been thoroughly trashed, and that Jormungandr is the culprit. Loki is more concerned that his child will become ill from chewing on Snape's bedroom slippers.


[*This does not quite follow the timelines given to us by either the movies or the books. In this, Jormungander is not fully grown.*]

After dealing with students all day, tolerating Weasley's idiocy, Neville the forgetful, Granger the knowitall, and attempting to prevent Malfoy and Potter from killing each other, the only thing that Snape wanted to do was sit down with some tea and read a good book.

As he entered his chambers however, something was amiss. There was a giant chunk taken out of the side of his armchair, books and sheets were scattered across the floor, and an end table was knocked over, one leg entirely ripped off.

Ever vigilant, Snape whipped out his wand, holding it aloft in front of him. He took several steps further into his living area, eyes narrowed in suspicion. Turning into the room that functioned as his bed chamber, the potions teacher came face to face with a fairly large snake chewing on one of his slippers.

For a moment, he was confused. Didn't Potter and Weasley kill the Basilisk already?

As the greasy-haired bat-impersonator looked on, the snake looked up at him lazily, as if daring him to say something. His jaw dropped, and several seconds passed before he found his voice. Before he could imperiously demand that the snake spit out his slipper and make itself scarce before he did away with it, a quiet voice from behind him said, "Jormy, do spit that out. You'll make yourself ill."

[/Jormy?! That thing had a name?! And a nickname said fondly at that?/] Flabbergasted, Snape spun around, robes nearly tangling with his legs. By sheer willpower, the former Death Eater managed not to fall flat on his face. Behind him stood a rather tall and fairly slender man, wearing a rather odd looking helmet.

The potions master glanced back towards the giant snake, who had now spat out the half-eaten and thoroughly soggy slipper onto his carpeting. This was more than enough to raise his blood pressure a few points.

"Who are you?" He demanded, but he didn't quite know if he were asking it of the man or the snake.

It would appear that the man deemed the question his to answer, for he said, "I am Loki of Asgard, and I am burdended by glorious-Jormungander! I told you to spit that out."

"You're burdened by glorious Jormungander?" Snape raised an eyebrow at this.

"Yes, when he takes it upon himself to chew on everything in sight. Do you know how many books I've lost? If not for the fact that he attempts to chew off my oaf of a brother's feet every other week, I'd never be happier than when his teething stage is far behind him. What I meant to say, however, was that I am Loki of Asgard, and I am burdened by glorious purpose."

[/The man talks as if this snake is his child!/]

"Now, I'll be collecting my son, and we'll be out of your rather greasy hair now." Loki said, stepping past the other magic user.

This was too much for the potions master. "That's your child?!" The professor practically sqwacked. He couldn't wrap his mind around the concept. Not entirely at could a man have a non-human child? Was this the result of transfiguration gone wrong? An animagus?

"Yes, this is my child, and he's rather handsome." The demi-god snapped angrily. He didn't like when people, especially strangers, made comments about his precious children. After all, their feelings might be hurt, and that wouldn't do at all.

"In that case, your child chewed up my slippers." Was the only thing that Snape could manage in his attempt not to look entirely confused and lost.

"Ah yes, those disgusting things. If Jormy suffers indigestion later, I know who to blame it on." The Jotun replied, waving his hand lazily. A new pair of fuzzy green slippers appeared on Snape's bedside table.

Then, the Asgardian prince proceeded to pick up his miscreant child, and with a snap of his fingers, the two of them disappeared in a puff of smoke, leaving a befuddled Snivelus Snape behind.

[*I just realized that I've been a fan of Harry Potter for quite a while now, and still have yet to write anything for the fandom, when on the flipside, only recently have I gotten into the Avengers fandom, and already I'm writing fics for it. Then again, it took me the better part of a decade to even consider writing anything for the Inheritance Cycle. Wow, I'm backwards.*] 


End file.
